The Transformation

Wow. That is all I can say about these past 24 weeks. My life has been forever changed in more ways than words can ever describe. BUT here goes…

I walked into Dusty’s office with the intention that I wanted to lose weight, get healthy, and possibly compete. I left Dusty’s office an hour later knowing that I was 160lbs, 28% body fat, and stepping on stage in a tiny ass bikini on October 10^th and 17^th, 2015. Yeah, that’s real life.

My prep began in May and I was so excited. I thought I had everything in life a girl could want. I finished my undergrad in psychology, I got a job teaching yoga, I enjoyed my job at the hospital, I had a boyfriend, a roof over my head, and a good support system.

This prep though, it makes you emotional. It challenges you in ways you didn’t know you could or would ever be challenged. You are forced to learn about yourself and the other people in your life. I cried almost daily, and 90% of those tears were shed in the gym. The gym became my safe place when my world turned upside down.

Fast forward three months to August. My prep was not difficult, I actually had it easy compared to some and had very few low days. The low days though, are what get you. The bad days attack and eat you alive. August was THE WORST. In August, my boyfriend and I broke up, and very shortly after that my grandfather passed away. I had been married, divorced, and lost my father to cancer by the time I was 26 and none of that compares to this. I used to run to food and alcohol to suppress my feelings. I used food and alcohol as a way to bond and build relationships. This time, I couldn’t do that.

I showed up to multiple sessions with Dusty crying. The session after my grandfather passed will be an hour of my life that I never forget. I had lost 4 pounds in a little over a week, and was a mess. I walked through the door and Dusty took one look at me and said get in my truck we aren’t training today. We spent that hour talking about everything. Past, present, and future. Holding in the negativity wasn’t going to get anywhere. Letting it go and moving on is what needed to happen and so it did.

I was not perfect on my prep. I binge ate almond butter, I had mixed nuts when I shouldn’t have. But we’re human. Prep is hard. I learned so much about myself as a person. I have been able to forgive people in my life and let go of past hurt in order to move forward in a positive relationship. I have found a confidence and a love for myself that I didn’t know was possible. I have found who my true support system is in my family and friends. The best part is that I gained an entirely new family in the Renovation Training team, through thick and thin they have become home to me.

I stepped on stage on October 10^th and 17^th knowing that I did the best I could and that no matter what the outcome I have a life to be so proud of. This journey is my trophy, and it’s the best trophy a girl could ask for.